7. The Top of the Pyramid

Here are some questions regarding "Inattention to Results," which is one of the levels of the pyramid of five dysfunctions of a team.

1. When do you most find yourself planning the group's objective around your own agenda rather than the collective interest of the team or according to the team's goals?

2. Do you think it is more or less difficult to work as a team in America's individualistic yet task- and achievement-oriented culture?

3. Why specifically is this level the biggest problem with dysfunctional teams?

4. What examples of this level can be found in the Bible (positive or negative)?

5 What parallels are there to a team of human beings and a school of fish?

That last one is deep.

6. This One Goes Out to my Beloved Seymour

Why, hello again! Don't you love it when I greet you so enthusiastically? I hope it makes you feel special.
Anyhoo. Let's get to it.


1. Would you consider your communication to be unassertive, assertive, or aggressive? How can you improve in your listening skills?


According to my personal evaluation, I'd say I am a pretty assertive communicator. Internally, I may fluctuate between having unassertive and aggressive thoughts, but overall I definitely try to be balanced in my responses.
I used to be a very compliant communicator. I thought that by consenting to everybody's requests, I was being a good servant. In reality, I was being a bad steward of my property and myself. Now I know I am not responsible for anyone, and I should primarily be compelled by love, not obligation, to serve others. And, as the book Exploring Leadership states, I am fully able to say no without feeling guilty.
Mentally, I used to get pretty aggressive against others. The only reason why I didn't let it come out was because I was the "perfect" little pastor's kid I thought everybody had certain expectations for (even though nobody, especially my wonderful parents, ever manipulated me like that). God has since begun the process of renewing my mind like Christ's, and I have much practice submitting negative thoughts to Him. Now my responses reflect my heart. For the most part...
Taking the "listening self-evaluation," I confirmed my previous believe that I am an above-average listener, which I consider a gift. I still have room for improvement, however. For instance, instead of multi-tasking - doing homework and listening to my roommate tell me her thoughts - I can either tell her I can't talk that moment or drop what I am doing to listen to her. I'd like to become more people-oriented than task-oriented as well.


2. Think of an ethical dilemma that you have faced, were involved with, or observed closely. Work through that dilemma using one of the three ethical decision-making models described in the text - ends-based, rule-based, or care-based. Explain what the dilemma was and what decision-maiking process you or others used to reach a solution.


What I am about to share is a very touchy subject for me, so hang tight. There was one childhood pet (a.k.a. family member) I didn't mention in my last blog. One sunny summer day, my little brother and I found a male praying mantis. Naturally, we took him home and named him Seymour. I don't know how many people actually believe me when I say Seymour may have been an insect, but I promise you this bug had visible emotions. No joke, you could see him light up and smile when we took him out of his fishbowl to play with him. A few weeks later, we found a female praying mantis. I don't even remember what we named her. We took her home and (again, I am not kidding) Seymour spent the day moping in the bottom corner of the fishbowl, hanging his head like he was depressed or something. We were confused, but thought nothing of it as we left the house for an event that night. Long story short, we forgot that female praying mantises eat their mates. Yeah. It was a dark day in the Matty home.


So here was my momentous ethical dilemma: Squish her like the bug she is or let her live?
I let her live. Little did I know it was the right decision. She laid an egg sack a few weeks later. (Then we got rid of her, but hey, at least we let her give birth first.) We set out the stick with the egg sack on it outside, and come Spring, about a zillion praying mantis babies skittered away to make little mantis lives of their own.
According to the book Exploring Leadership, I'd say my decision was ultimately ends-based because as much as I wanted to brutally maim the female, I restrained myself for the sake of the greater good - namely, the babies. I did (or rather, didn't do) what I knew would produce the greatest good for the greatest number. I'm still bitter about the female eating my buddy Seymour, but I'm glad that I let her live so her babies could maybe make some other kid happy like Seymour made me and my little brother happy.


Now that I think about it, the same thing happened with my fish. Pebbles was smaller than Bam Bam, so Bam Bam ate all the food and literally starved Pebbles to death.
Needless to say...I killed Bam Bam. Yes, it's true.
Just kidding. I have no idea what happened. I can't remember.

Nope, Bam Bam died of hyperalimentation. R.I.P. Bam Bam.

5. Special Shout-Out to my Fish, Bam-Bam and Pebbles

Salutations! Today's blog will consist mainly of my personal favorite subject: my family. That makes me happy. :)


So here's the question of the day: Select a context a describe its culture - its beliefs, aesthetic standards, behavioral norms, rituals, and patterns of communication.
My family has always included my dad and mom. My little brother, my dog, my rabbit, my hermit crab, my baby chicken, and yes, my fish (how did you guess?) had become familial additions in some way or another. The two former of said family members still remain. I'm glad of this because they're pretty much my favorite anyway.
Distinguishing the culture of my family is going to be a challenge because I've been so close to the project for so long I'm used to any idiosyncrasies I might have otherwise easily picked out. However, I'll do my best in this endeavor. In fact, I'll make it easier for me to write and for you to read by breaking it down into sections. And I'll call them "fish bites." Why, you ask? No reason.


Fish Bite #1: Beliefs
We are all Christ-followers. Yes, so is my dog. Don't ask stupid questions like that.


Fish Bite #2: Aesthetic Standards
We are a pretty laid-back family. We hang around the house in our pajamas when we don't have anything going on. Well, except my dad, who is little more proper than the rest of us, but I like that about him. On the other hand, my mom insists on our wearing formal clothing whenever we go to straitlaced events (which seriously isn't at all that often). Overall, we all consider going to our church in jeans as acceptable.


Fish Bite #3: Behavioral Norms
My dad is very chill, very reserved, with a dignified composure. My mom is almost the exact opposite - enthusiastic and zestful. You can imagine how said converse is exceedingly amusing to live with. I daily enjoy myself.
My little brother is the most amazing guy I have ever known. He is considerate, encouraging, optimistic, confident, creative, fun, witty, and has a hilarious sense of humor that I can easily bounce off of. I've told him many times I want to marry someone like him. If you think that's weird, go find a little brother of your own to love and tell me how you feel.


Fish Bite #4: Rituals
Does watching the extended versions of the Lord of the Rings movies every Christmas break count as a ritual? Seriously, we're a take-things-as-they-come and make-it-up-as-we-go-along kind of family. I cannot for the life of me regard anything we do as ritualistic.


Fish Bite #5: Patterns of Communication
Oh, I could go on about this one. Generally, we all have pretty different yet compatible ways of communicating with each other. My mom, for instance, emails everything to us when she wants us to know something - from miscellaneous information she thought might interest us to comic strips to upcoming due dates for library items, and much more.
My dad is quite the opposite. He has a Facebook, but he uses so much discretion, he never posts anything. He is very sensitive with the privacy of himself and others. However, he freely expresses his thoughts and opinions when he is in the company of his own family, but only when you ask him.
My little brother's communication style is so complex I feel it would take more than a blog to explain. He is much like our dad in his reservation with people who are not immediate family, but also like our mom's personality with people he considers as family. That's as far as I can go without confusing you.


Random bonus fact: Eating food off of each other's plates is also typical behavior. Well...for me, at least.


As you can see, I could spend all day talking about my family. But I won't. This will give you the option of coming to find out more about us yourself. I look forward to your visit.

R.I.P. Pebbles. My love will always be with you.